Wow.
People told me after my exams were over, I'd be able to sleep, I wouldn't feel sick. People don't know anything. Ugh.
'Tis a little strange; the last twelve years of my life have been devoted to school, and 'acquiring an education,' then suddenly, it's bang bang bang big tests, and it's over. Kind of ridiculous to spend that long learning for a collective...14hours and 45minutes. Sucks if those are the few hours in your life where you let the pressure get to ya eh...Oh well. Results in under two weeks. Frightening. I can't wait for the awkward backtracking from all those people that say 'oh, you'll do great, no problem..' They infuriate me.
I've been working a bit more since school's over, which i guess is good for the money, but it seems as monotonous, or possibly even more so, as everything else in my life.
But, on the bright side, i have a kitten, who makes the world seem a little less grotesque when she attacks me as i walk past. I'm in love.
I waste an awful lot of time, i reckon. And considering I'm usually awake for more hours than most, normal, non-nocturnal people, my lack of accomplishment in my waking hours are even more depressing. My sleeping hour(s), however, have convinced me that my boyfriend is going to cheat on me when i visit him, and his mistress has an awful high-pitched voice. Ah, the art that is imagination.
I will be sending my christmas cards tomorrow. I'm sending fifty something, and handing out another bunch, and I'm not entirely sure why, seeing as though the majority of those who will be recipients don't like me nearly as much as i like the idea of them being my 'friend.' Christmas does strange things to me, like compells me to spend all my money on items that nobody wants, wrap them in paper that has trees on it, and then claim it was picked out with love, or something. Lies, it was picked out with a foul taste in the back of my throat telling me i'm wasting my time. Joy to the world.
It is currently 2 something am, and after an hour or so of facebook stalking, another hour of forumming, and many horrid songs finding their way to the play section of my iPod thanks to my friend 'shuffle songs,' the exhaustion is almost overpowering enough to let me sleep. As i should have done some hours ago, when George did perhaps, somewhere in between my hanging up after being delerious with unexplained sadness, and my several rediallings of his number with the false hope that he would wake back up. For a naight he was gonna 'stay up as late as he could,' i think 12 is pretty weak. I get there without even trying. I really shouldn't get grumpy at him for needing one of the basics for human life; perhaps i'm just jealous i'm not granted the same mercy by my mind.
So, turns out, I'm more like my mother than i thought. Let's leave it at that, shall we?
That's a lot of writing that says nothing in particular. Fabulous.
I love you, George. Promise.
Monday, November 30, 2009
Monday, August 31, 2009
Goodbye Winter
August the Thirty-first. In 1888, it was thought to be the date Jack The Ripper killed his first victim, Mary something-or-other. In 1997, Princess Diana died. So it comes as no surprise that today wasnt great, and being Monday, hopes for it to be good were low. Oh well.
I woke up, to my first alarm, but didnt get out of bed til the third, at which time i jumped in the shower, and put off walking to school for as long as possible. Well, until twenty to nine anyway.
I got to school; because i dawdled it was almost bell time, so i didnt have to wait around much. Good.
Chemistry, Lima produced mini m&ms in a green tube. How i love her. We spent the lesson talking about batteries again, it wasnt terribly exciting, and we have a couple of sacs coming up. Bloody prac sacs, how i loathe them. I should get the last one back wednesday, cant wait,/sarcasm.
Literature, handed in my very lame attempt at an analysis of Antigone before we broke up into groups and found evidence of the main themes throughout the play. It was useful, but still boring. Oh well. I suppose we have a lit sac coming up tooo...
Recess, concrete was cold, music was loud. Ah, Savage Garden, how i missed you. I dont have much on the music maker though, must fix this.
Biology; hallelujah i finished my squares picture, while Mr allen corrected a test thing, and some questions i know i did, but so long ago so i have noo idea where they are. We have a sac on wednesday. Ugh.
Lunch; Boooooring. I was kinda out of it the whole time, so if anything happened, i dont know about it.
English, Mr Brennan left part way through the class, looking mighty unhappy. We were all left; Wut-ing. But got over it quickly and i went over my squares in a drak red pen courtesy of Emma. Alex must've got in trouble, because he was up the back of the class the whole lesson. Lisa got her sac back, and got 34? out of 50. This makes me not so anxious to recieve mine back, as i know i didnt write very goodly. Oh well. Possibly should igone ITLOTW for exam, but i already booked the lecture. We'll see.
Hometime. Joshy did not seem happy, and looked rather cold. The bus seemed to take a long time to turn up. My book is taking a long time to read. My sense of time is all out of whack; i do not like it very much. Perhaps i need to get me one of those flux capacitors...
I did some Bio study when i got home, and didnt do a lot else. I read a magazine or two. Thats really it.
Its cold in my room. And dark. I dont really wanna sleep.
The End.
I woke up, to my first alarm, but didnt get out of bed til the third, at which time i jumped in the shower, and put off walking to school for as long as possible. Well, until twenty to nine anyway.
I got to school; because i dawdled it was almost bell time, so i didnt have to wait around much. Good.
Chemistry, Lima produced mini m&ms in a green tube. How i love her. We spent the lesson talking about batteries again, it wasnt terribly exciting, and we have a couple of sacs coming up. Bloody prac sacs, how i loathe them. I should get the last one back wednesday, cant wait,/sarcasm.
Literature, handed in my very lame attempt at an analysis of Antigone before we broke up into groups and found evidence of the main themes throughout the play. It was useful, but still boring. Oh well. I suppose we have a lit sac coming up tooo...
Recess, concrete was cold, music was loud. Ah, Savage Garden, how i missed you. I dont have much on the music maker though, must fix this.
Biology; hallelujah i finished my squares picture, while Mr allen corrected a test thing, and some questions i know i did, but so long ago so i have noo idea where they are. We have a sac on wednesday. Ugh.
Lunch; Boooooring. I was kinda out of it the whole time, so if anything happened, i dont know about it.
English, Mr Brennan left part way through the class, looking mighty unhappy. We were all left; Wut-ing. But got over it quickly and i went over my squares in a drak red pen courtesy of Emma. Alex must've got in trouble, because he was up the back of the class the whole lesson. Lisa got her sac back, and got 34? out of 50. This makes me not so anxious to recieve mine back, as i know i didnt write very goodly. Oh well. Possibly should igone ITLOTW for exam, but i already booked the lecture. We'll see.
Hometime. Joshy did not seem happy, and looked rather cold. The bus seemed to take a long time to turn up. My book is taking a long time to read. My sense of time is all out of whack; i do not like it very much. Perhaps i need to get me one of those flux capacitors...
I did some Bio study when i got home, and didnt do a lot else. I read a magazine or two. Thats really it.
Its cold in my room. And dark. I dont really wanna sleep.
The End.
Saturday, August 29, 2009
Right. Well,Last night, i broke up with the person i love. Before you go all, "hate hate hate bitch bitch bitch bitch" on me, i will attempt to explain my reasoning, and after that, think what you want.Over the last..oh i dont know, five or six months, i have been increasingly...disconnected is the word ill use, from everything; people, places, thoughts. Its nobody's fault or anything, its just what i feel. Waking up and dreading going anywhere, but not wanting to stay home, not wanting to talk to anybody, not wanting to do anything; its not me. But its whats been going on with me lately. And all the confusion and anger i have felt, i have taken out on the people i love, one of those being George Austin Smith. And i hurt him, whether or not he admits it. My constant psychotic mood swings, and plain bitchiness pushed a gap between us; i know it was there, i felt it, i saw it. Sometimes, I felt like i was talking to a stranger, and sometimes, a lot of the time, i felt like the stranger. im not sure exactly how much sense i'm making; im trying to explain this to my self as much as anyone else. so, what i decided, is to take some time to reconnect with myself (my gosh that sounds retarded) and try and fix whatever's wrong with me. Which is why i did a horrible thing to George. I love him, a lot, which in a strange way is why i thought this was the right thing to do. I hate the way i hurt him, because he is fantastic, and deserves better. I shall stop now. 30-08-09
Friday, August 28, 2009
A Nice Big Plate Of Fish
WEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEKEEEEENNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNND!. Bout bloody time, really.
I was too lazy yesterday to write anything, so i didnt. ta-da. So instead, i will write about yesterday, today. Aha, Magic! Just like mushrooms and Wizz Fizz.
So Anyway, Yesterday, was Turtle's Birthday; Happy Birthday Teagy :) i miss my teagan, a lot a lot.
Got up, got to school, and wandered down the street with Christopher to obtain credits for my telephonical device. I decided they make the little card things far too idiot proof; plastic covers AND a scratchy part? Come, On! Oh well. I got it eventually, are you proud?
First up on a lovely thursday morning, is a fantastic 75 minutes of Japanese. Egh. I am not enjoying this environmental section at all, and would like it to go away, especially when the teacher cant read the vocab either. Oh well, she assured us our reading SAC would be far easier.
Then, assembly, i sat on the floor, and apparently its Maureens last day today (friday), this was both shocking and not fun. Many an applause was had. Arnup rattled on about VTAC forms (get them in, rah rah rah) and Sabs tried to talk us into attending all hundred of the revision lectures. Blech.
English study, pretty much free lesson, i tried to start my lit analysis but V kept distracting me and i didnt get anything done. (i did write a sentence, but it was not very pretty so i scribbled it out..) Stupid english study. We compared the amount of work our english teachers gave us; Swoz apparently gives a lot of work (on pink paper), Sabs gives the same work as Swoz, only less, and Brennan gives us the work that the others did two weeks after they did it. Hurm.
Reeeeeecesssssss. Not many good times to be had; i dont remember doing anything of interest.
English. Bleh. I handed in my Jindabyne thingo, and drew Teagan a picture for the rest of the lesson, the teacher told me it was pretty. (not sure where that is now actually...)
Lunch, i think i did something? maybe, gosh i dunno anymore. Cant have been too fun, or i'd have remembered, yes? Oh wait. I may have sat with Bentley. I did! thats right, i took photos of the few people at school. Good fun, will repeat on Monday. Watchout ;)
Period four, i hung out with V in the library and did (multi choice) chem questions, and chatted to Joshy.
Bus, home, computer, bed. Pretty much it. Not much sleep was had, thats for suree.
TODAY, was a lovely day, in regards to the weather at least. I got to "sleep" in a little; Mum hadda take the kids into their Aths sports. Got to school half way through my spare, chatted to Lima and Jess for a bit.
Then, bio. Mr Allens slideshows nearly had half the class asleep. Then, thankfully, the year twelvers in the class got to leave. Though considering what we left for, i think i would have rathered bio...
The English lecture. Yarram kids rocked up, their year twelve jumper names arent very creative, and there was a random redjumpered one that seemed to know V (friend of the boyfriend i assume..?) and then it began. The man was like Mr Brennan on speed really. And my god he was sweating a lot. It was distracting. And what he had to say wasnt relevant to me, so really, i think bio sleep would have been more useful. Aw well.
Extended lunch, Went down to IGA, got jap candy, then we went and got lunch, then tried to find out the name of the year ten we saw down the street so we could get a lollipop. :) Then, Swarbrick saw me on the stairs so i dragged patterson into her room with me, while she chatted to us about english work and the above-mentioned lecture. Hurm.
Jap time! Booooooring. I did a survey for midget chris (who looks like Martin Morning, in case i have previously neglected this information) and then more environmental stuff; transitive and intransitive verbs suck. Much candy was had, and Zoe found me a new friend; Ringo the Bug. (not beetle, gosh.) I like to have friends that seem unable to get away from me. :)
Hometime, Mummy picked me up, so no bus-waiting for me :) Hooray. I got home, decided to make cookies, made said cookies, dyed them blue, talked to a sickly sounding Bek briefly (feel better <3) then the parentals went out, James and i played Singstar (i have recordings of "Its Tricky" on my phone for lols) (and i am going to make Chris play it one day, whether he likes it or not...it maaaay or may not take a little liquer..) then we watched some of Nanny McPhee, i rang my sister and planned many a cocktail creations with her and did enough talking for the both of us seeing as though i was on some kind of high..i suspect its the half a can of coke i drank before.., then thats really it. Oh, and i added some randoms, on the facebooks, just for fun really. I dunno. I like the thought of clicking for friends, it amuses me, a lot a lot.
I feel incredibly guilty, for not talking to George a lot today, im not a very nice person, i suggest somebody buries me alive or burns me at the Stake. SHES A WITCH; GET'ER. But, i dunno. Caity suggests i "see someone about it;" it being my...iunno behaviour i guess...she thinks im crazy. Most do. I heard "most people i know, think that im cray-zee-ee-ee" on the radio today, and actually laughed, because it was exactly what was going through my head at the time. Ha.
Sleep in tomorrow, woo
The End
I was too lazy yesterday to write anything, so i didnt. ta-da. So instead, i will write about yesterday, today. Aha, Magic! Just like mushrooms and Wizz Fizz.
So Anyway, Yesterday, was Turtle's Birthday; Happy Birthday Teagy :) i miss my teagan, a lot a lot.
Got up, got to school, and wandered down the street with Christopher to obtain credits for my telephonical device. I decided they make the little card things far too idiot proof; plastic covers AND a scratchy part? Come, On! Oh well. I got it eventually, are you proud?
First up on a lovely thursday morning, is a fantastic 75 minutes of Japanese. Egh. I am not enjoying this environmental section at all, and would like it to go away, especially when the teacher cant read the vocab either. Oh well, she assured us our reading SAC would be far easier.
Then, assembly, i sat on the floor, and apparently its Maureens last day today (friday), this was both shocking and not fun. Many an applause was had. Arnup rattled on about VTAC forms (get them in, rah rah rah) and Sabs tried to talk us into attending all hundred of the revision lectures. Blech.
English study, pretty much free lesson, i tried to start my lit analysis but V kept distracting me and i didnt get anything done. (i did write a sentence, but it was not very pretty so i scribbled it out..) Stupid english study. We compared the amount of work our english teachers gave us; Swoz apparently gives a lot of work (on pink paper), Sabs gives the same work as Swoz, only less, and Brennan gives us the work that the others did two weeks after they did it. Hurm.
Reeeeeecesssssss. Not many good times to be had; i dont remember doing anything of interest.
English. Bleh. I handed in my Jindabyne thingo, and drew Teagan a picture for the rest of the lesson, the teacher told me it was pretty. (not sure where that is now actually...)
Lunch, i think i did something? maybe, gosh i dunno anymore. Cant have been too fun, or i'd have remembered, yes? Oh wait. I may have sat with Bentley. I did! thats right, i took photos of the few people at school. Good fun, will repeat on Monday. Watchout ;)
Period four, i hung out with V in the library and did (multi choice) chem questions, and chatted to Joshy.
Bus, home, computer, bed. Pretty much it. Not much sleep was had, thats for suree.
TODAY, was a lovely day, in regards to the weather at least. I got to "sleep" in a little; Mum hadda take the kids into their Aths sports. Got to school half way through my spare, chatted to Lima and Jess for a bit.
Then, bio. Mr Allens slideshows nearly had half the class asleep. Then, thankfully, the year twelvers in the class got to leave. Though considering what we left for, i think i would have rathered bio...
The English lecture. Yarram kids rocked up, their year twelve jumper names arent very creative, and there was a random redjumpered one that seemed to know V (friend of the boyfriend i assume..?) and then it began. The man was like Mr Brennan on speed really. And my god he was sweating a lot. It was distracting. And what he had to say wasnt relevant to me, so really, i think bio sleep would have been more useful. Aw well.
Extended lunch, Went down to IGA, got jap candy, then we went and got lunch, then tried to find out the name of the year ten we saw down the street so we could get a lollipop. :) Then, Swarbrick saw me on the stairs so i dragged patterson into her room with me, while she chatted to us about english work and the above-mentioned lecture. Hurm.
Jap time! Booooooring. I did a survey for midget chris (who looks like Martin Morning, in case i have previously neglected this information) and then more environmental stuff; transitive and intransitive verbs suck. Much candy was had, and Zoe found me a new friend; Ringo the Bug. (not beetle, gosh.) I like to have friends that seem unable to get away from me. :)
Hometime, Mummy picked me up, so no bus-waiting for me :) Hooray. I got home, decided to make cookies, made said cookies, dyed them blue, talked to a sickly sounding Bek briefly (feel better <3) then the parentals went out, James and i played Singstar (i have recordings of "Its Tricky" on my phone for lols) (and i am going to make Chris play it one day, whether he likes it or not...it maaaay or may not take a little liquer..) then we watched some of Nanny McPhee, i rang my sister and planned many a cocktail creations with her and did enough talking for the both of us seeing as though i was on some kind of high..i suspect its the half a can of coke i drank before.., then thats really it. Oh, and i added some randoms, on the facebooks, just for fun really. I dunno. I like the thought of clicking for friends, it amuses me, a lot a lot.
I feel incredibly guilty, for not talking to George a lot today, im not a very nice person, i suggest somebody buries me alive or burns me at the Stake. SHES A WITCH; GET'ER. But, i dunno. Caity suggests i "see someone about it;" it being my...iunno behaviour i guess...she thinks im crazy. Most do. I heard "most people i know, think that im cray-zee-ee-ee" on the radio today, and actually laughed, because it was exactly what was going through my head at the time. Ha.
Sleep in tomorrow, woo
The End
Wednesday, August 26, 2009
Would You Miss Me If I Went To Canada?
Non mi piace mercoledì.
Eu não gosto de wednesdays.
Nie lubię środy.
Je n'aiment pas les mercredis.
No me gusta miércoles.
no matter what language its in, the point is, Wednesdays are never much fun. With this in mind, i got up not looking forward to schooling. It did not disappoint.
So anyways, after an enthralling bus ride of loud music and an intriguing book of demon children (well, kinda), i arrived at school at 8:27 as per usual. 'Was surprised to see Zoe there so early, but a good surprise, like finding cash in the pocket of your jeans you havent worn in ages. Went to the library with her to stalk Tessa and Phillip. Rivetting stuff. Bjorksten couldn't see what was so funny about "Akarna" and i suppose it wasnt that funny, but lack of sleep and early ness makes eeeeverything funny. General mood was a wanting to be somewhere else. Oh, Well.
Biology, apparently i missed very little on Monday as i had the whole lesson copied down before we'd even started the lesson. I decided to waste my time colouring in the lines of my workbook all rainbow and pretty. It amused me. Looked through my handed-back sac, only minor stuff i lost marks on, so its all good. We've started the evolution module. Joy, we getta learn about monkies! Ha, ha. Erin drew me a castle, well two actually, and we chatted as per usual, which made Mr Allen crosser than usual. Oh well. I think that it should be not too difficult, even if it doesnt interest me..
Spare. Lima, it seems they get louder when you're not there, its really not that fun. I actually had a productive lesson; i did that thingo for English, the creative thing, and i read some chem stuff and lit stuff. Productive, yes. Fun, hardly. At least it wasnt the dog making all the goddam noise, and im fairly sure they apologised for the noise at some point, but by then, my music was up fairly high and i could hardly hear my thoughts let alone anyone else.
Reeeeecess. It, was, bloody, WINDY. The damn basketball court, sure it is right in the sun, but it needs a bloody wind break. Argh. Chris came and sat with us because his friends were footballing and nobody enjoys football. I stole his phone and broke it whoops. And my juice was far too cold to drink so i gave it to Patterson. Darn winter.
Literature. Well, we read through an example analysis that we have to try and do, and did a bunch of sentences. It was not fun, especially because my head was not working well. But then, we got our SACs back, and i must say i was chuffed with my 47 out of 50. Especially as it was a fairly lame story. Woohoo. :) :) I beat the smart girl i beat the smart girl...
Erin, Patterson and I streeted, for hot chocolate and cake. Ha, the muffin break person wasnt too bright, she gave us extra freebies. Raw sugar is not for hot chocolate Erin.
Got back to school, and it was chem time. Joy.
Well it wasnt a bad lesson, because it was stuff we already knew for the most part and i could actually answer stuff and it made me look moderately intellegent. AN OIL RIG CAT, and Stapes left halfway through so we had a laid-back lesson with Vale. Sourced some information from wikipedia, which is a worry, and Vale proceeded to tell us how for two days he was credited with making some major physics discovery. I lol'd. The meaning of life is indeed potato chaaaaarliiiiiiiiie.
Hometime, the wind made me cold so many-a-hugs were collected ( thanks rachey, stacey, clairey, teena, bentley, becky, tessa, and ducky for sharing body heat, twas much appreciated)before a monotonous bus trip and home.I watched my little brother make cookies by himself, i ate one and didnt die so i guess he did good (:Eated food, briefly chatted to my stepdad, looked up the scholarship thing, did a chem question then gave up, stalked people via the internet and drew a cat.
It was seriously that boring.
Oh oh oh! And before, claire messaged me to tell me she is going out with Julian. Again. Woah, i saw it coming, but then i didnt. So it blew my mind a little.
People need to stop messaging me when i have no credit. Especially when the buttheads dont message me any other goddam time.
Apparently Cass has a boyfriend. Wow, i have been missing a lot i think. Which is why i am gutted that i cant go to grand final. FAAAAAAAAAAAAAARK. Stupid everybody. Gah. I wanted my hugs dammit!
Hmm, im not sure that this scholarship is relevant; seeing as though it asks for SAT scores and such, so idunno about it. It'd be fun though, even though some people like the idea that its not likely ill get in. Ah well.
And tomorrow, being thursday, is notorious for being boring. Oh well. MUST REMEMBER TO TAKE MY CAMERA. I need to do some serious stalking. My wall has blank spots people.
Happy Birthday to Tegan
Happy Birthday Eve to Teagan
Happy UnBirthday to everyone else.
The End
Eu não gosto de wednesdays.
Nie lubię środy.
Je n'aiment pas les mercredis.
No me gusta miércoles.
no matter what language its in, the point is, Wednesdays are never much fun. With this in mind, i got up not looking forward to schooling. It did not disappoint.
So anyways, after an enthralling bus ride of loud music and an intriguing book of demon children (well, kinda), i arrived at school at 8:27 as per usual. 'Was surprised to see Zoe there so early, but a good surprise, like finding cash in the pocket of your jeans you havent worn in ages. Went to the library with her to stalk Tessa and Phillip. Rivetting stuff. Bjorksten couldn't see what was so funny about "Akarna" and i suppose it wasnt that funny, but lack of sleep and early ness makes eeeeverything funny. General mood was a wanting to be somewhere else. Oh, Well.
Biology, apparently i missed very little on Monday as i had the whole lesson copied down before we'd even started the lesson. I decided to waste my time colouring in the lines of my workbook all rainbow and pretty. It amused me. Looked through my handed-back sac, only minor stuff i lost marks on, so its all good. We've started the evolution module. Joy, we getta learn about monkies! Ha, ha. Erin drew me a castle, well two actually, and we chatted as per usual, which made Mr Allen crosser than usual. Oh well. I think that it should be not too difficult, even if it doesnt interest me..
Spare. Lima, it seems they get louder when you're not there, its really not that fun. I actually had a productive lesson; i did that thingo for English, the creative thing, and i read some chem stuff and lit stuff. Productive, yes. Fun, hardly. At least it wasnt the dog making all the goddam noise, and im fairly sure they apologised for the noise at some point, but by then, my music was up fairly high and i could hardly hear my thoughts let alone anyone else.
Reeeeecess. It, was, bloody, WINDY. The damn basketball court, sure it is right in the sun, but it needs a bloody wind break. Argh. Chris came and sat with us because his friends were footballing and nobody enjoys football. I stole his phone and broke it whoops. And my juice was far too cold to drink so i gave it to Patterson. Darn winter.
Literature. Well, we read through an example analysis that we have to try and do, and did a bunch of sentences. It was not fun, especially because my head was not working well. But then, we got our SACs back, and i must say i was chuffed with my 47 out of 50. Especially as it was a fairly lame story. Woohoo. :) :) I beat the smart girl i beat the smart girl...
Erin, Patterson and I streeted, for hot chocolate and cake. Ha, the muffin break person wasnt too bright, she gave us extra freebies. Raw sugar is not for hot chocolate Erin.
Got back to school, and it was chem time. Joy.
Well it wasnt a bad lesson, because it was stuff we already knew for the most part and i could actually answer stuff and it made me look moderately intellegent. AN OIL RIG CAT, and Stapes left halfway through so we had a laid-back lesson with Vale. Sourced some information from wikipedia, which is a worry, and Vale proceeded to tell us how for two days he was credited with making some major physics discovery. I lol'd. The meaning of life is indeed potato chaaaaarliiiiiiiiie.
Hometime, the wind made me cold so many-a-hugs were collected ( thanks rachey, stacey, clairey, teena, bentley, becky, tessa, and ducky for sharing body heat, twas much appreciated)before a monotonous bus trip and home.I watched my little brother make cookies by himself, i ate one and didnt die so i guess he did good (:Eated food, briefly chatted to my stepdad, looked up the scholarship thing, did a chem question then gave up, stalked people via the internet and drew a cat.
It was seriously that boring.
Oh oh oh! And before, claire messaged me to tell me she is going out with Julian. Again. Woah, i saw it coming, but then i didnt. So it blew my mind a little.
People need to stop messaging me when i have no credit. Especially when the buttheads dont message me any other goddam time.
Apparently Cass has a boyfriend. Wow, i have been missing a lot i think. Which is why i am gutted that i cant go to grand final. FAAAAAAAAAAAAAARK. Stupid everybody. Gah. I wanted my hugs dammit!
Hmm, im not sure that this scholarship is relevant; seeing as though it asks for SAT scores and such, so idunno about it. It'd be fun though, even though some people like the idea that its not likely ill get in. Ah well.
And tomorrow, being thursday, is notorious for being boring. Oh well. MUST REMEMBER TO TAKE MY CAMERA. I need to do some serious stalking. My wall has blank spots people.
Happy Birthday to Tegan
Happy Birthday Eve to Teagan
Happy UnBirthday to everyone else.
The End
Tuesday, August 25, 2009
Everybody Knows That You're Insane
Wow, i actually woke up to my first alarm; i got sunshine on a cloudy day; which was handy as it took me a little bit to locate my school junk. Ah, school, how i loathe thee and the early mornings that are lived through because of thee..
oh! My dream is back! the one where the streets are lined with people i know that are dead. How i missed it. Argh, stupid subconscious is just being lazy and wont come up with some original material. Curse it.
I need to remember to take my book tomorrow on the bus, i was ever so bored without one today. Im currently reading, "the trouble with alex." It is amusing so far.
I got to school, recieved a ball of depression day wrist bands (22 in total, thanks guys :]) then other wrist bands courtesy of Erin/Douglas, then dragged Erin off to the library so i could do my English paragraph that i had left the prompt at school for. Knocked that over easy, then English Time. I gave that guy my paragraph, he wanted to read it aloud, i said no, then he told me to find something to do for half an hour while people finished off their seemingly tedious task from yesterday. I looked up words for Jap, and chatted to Claire.
After english, Jap Sac time. I was all shaky because i was nervous and kept forgetting my sentence patterns dammit, but i jumped at the chance to go first. Possibly not a good idea. Oh well. i stuffed up quite a bit and my fluency will be somewhere between zero and zero point five. Oh well, its done now. Damn Emily and Lisa and Gracie came out looking happy, thats not normal people! Then we did some translating of some customer complaints; basically some whiny person saying something about a box and a lousy shop assistant. Wtf. Cant say it was a productive lesson in the least. I am not enjoying jap; i have no motivation for doing it, especially as i only wanna do it to try and boost my enter. Then, i think, i need to do well in it for that to happen. So what the fuck am i doing here? Argh who knows.
Reeeeeecesssssss. It was windy and cold, why the hell did i wear shorts? Patterson Erry and I sat on the b'ball court and talked about..I dunno, i dont remember. Must've been terribly exciting. I went and talked to Crazy Campbell about what i missed in lit; she gave me stuff to do to fill in my otherwise timewasting spare. Chris looked not happy, poor kid. God knows what happened this time; the kids are prolly fighting. Again. Gah.
Study.. As Lima had already gone home, i sat in the study room (for once i appreciated the gazillion degree heat in there) and listened to music and did a first passage analysis on Antigone. Not terribly exciting, but straightforward. God damn Kira and her god damn shrill voice made me want to whack her in the head with a chair until she shut the hell up. I instead increased the volume of my music, which helped a little. Goddam dizziness, i am really getting sick of this shit, it is ever so much not fun when the bloody room is fuzzy and spinny when im sitting perfectly still. Curse those Nargals in my head.
Lunch, travelled down the street with Erry and Jess so Erry could look at hair dye, and i could get a couple of things too. Not too interesting, but it beats the idle chit chat on the basketball court. I saw Kelly too, looking happy as ever to be at work; lol. Oh well. I think i want to get some fabric paint nd some white tshirts and make some pretty stuff. I have no idea why. I like to destroy things i guess.
Lit. We did the first passage analysis on the board, then did some sentences, then got told to read a section of the text book. Boooooooriiiiiiiing. Oh well, easy at least.
Hometime. Bus.
I read a cook book with my brother and we decided on all the stuff we wanted to cook. O.o
I listened to him read, then read the newspaper, eated, did the dishes (Mum: you have to do the dishes before the power goes out!!) watched some tv then retreated to my room, and im about to undergo the long, slow process of studying. Ew.
I am far too sleepy for this junk, damn you Miss Universe Pageant! They all looked retarded anyway; all fake and shiny and not prettyful at all. And then the phone call i shouldnt have made. Yea, its prolly my fault, but GAWD i am ever so sick of testosterone.
All day it has felt like wednesday. Even though logically, because i missed school yesterday, it should feel like a monday, if not a tuesday. I wish it was wednesday, as i do not enjoy wednesdays at school, and had it been wednesday, it would already be over. Oh well, not to worry.
The End.
oh! My dream is back! the one where the streets are lined with people i know that are dead. How i missed it. Argh, stupid subconscious is just being lazy and wont come up with some original material. Curse it.
I need to remember to take my book tomorrow on the bus, i was ever so bored without one today. Im currently reading, "the trouble with alex." It is amusing so far.
I got to school, recieved a ball of depression day wrist bands (22 in total, thanks guys :]) then other wrist bands courtesy of Erin/Douglas, then dragged Erin off to the library so i could do my English paragraph that i had left the prompt at school for. Knocked that over easy, then English Time. I gave that guy my paragraph, he wanted to read it aloud, i said no, then he told me to find something to do for half an hour while people finished off their seemingly tedious task from yesterday. I looked up words for Jap, and chatted to Claire.
After english, Jap Sac time. I was all shaky because i was nervous and kept forgetting my sentence patterns dammit, but i jumped at the chance to go first. Possibly not a good idea. Oh well. i stuffed up quite a bit and my fluency will be somewhere between zero and zero point five. Oh well, its done now. Damn Emily and Lisa and Gracie came out looking happy, thats not normal people! Then we did some translating of some customer complaints; basically some whiny person saying something about a box and a lousy shop assistant. Wtf. Cant say it was a productive lesson in the least. I am not enjoying jap; i have no motivation for doing it, especially as i only wanna do it to try and boost my enter. Then, i think, i need to do well in it for that to happen. So what the fuck am i doing here? Argh who knows.
Reeeeeecesssssss. It was windy and cold, why the hell did i wear shorts? Patterson Erry and I sat on the b'ball court and talked about..I dunno, i dont remember. Must've been terribly exciting. I went and talked to Crazy Campbell about what i missed in lit; she gave me stuff to do to fill in my otherwise timewasting spare. Chris looked not happy, poor kid. God knows what happened this time; the kids are prolly fighting. Again. Gah.
Study.. As Lima had already gone home, i sat in the study room (for once i appreciated the gazillion degree heat in there) and listened to music and did a first passage analysis on Antigone. Not terribly exciting, but straightforward. God damn Kira and her god damn shrill voice made me want to whack her in the head with a chair until she shut the hell up. I instead increased the volume of my music, which helped a little. Goddam dizziness, i am really getting sick of this shit, it is ever so much not fun when the bloody room is fuzzy and spinny when im sitting perfectly still. Curse those Nargals in my head.
Lunch, travelled down the street with Erry and Jess so Erry could look at hair dye, and i could get a couple of things too. Not too interesting, but it beats the idle chit chat on the basketball court. I saw Kelly too, looking happy as ever to be at work; lol. Oh well. I think i want to get some fabric paint nd some white tshirts and make some pretty stuff. I have no idea why. I like to destroy things i guess.
Lit. We did the first passage analysis on the board, then did some sentences, then got told to read a section of the text book. Boooooooriiiiiiiing. Oh well, easy at least.
Hometime. Bus.
I read a cook book with my brother and we decided on all the stuff we wanted to cook. O.o
I listened to him read, then read the newspaper, eated, did the dishes (Mum: you have to do the dishes before the power goes out!!) watched some tv then retreated to my room, and im about to undergo the long, slow process of studying. Ew.
I am far too sleepy for this junk, damn you Miss Universe Pageant! They all looked retarded anyway; all fake and shiny and not prettyful at all. And then the phone call i shouldnt have made. Yea, its prolly my fault, but GAWD i am ever so sick of testosterone.
All day it has felt like wednesday. Even though logically, because i missed school yesterday, it should feel like a monday, if not a tuesday. I wish it was wednesday, as i do not enjoy wednesdays at school, and had it been wednesday, it would already be over. Oh well, not to worry.
The End.
Monday, August 24, 2009
"Depression Makes Me Happy- I Get Sugary Treats!"- Zoe
Weekends go to fast. Somebody fix that. Please.
Right. Well, it got to saturday. And after staying up late-ish friday night looking up terrible jokes to annoy people with, i woke up at twelveish, had a shower and jumped on the bus. Lo-and-behold, after waiting for it to show up with Josh, i got on and Zoe, Becc and Stacey were already on it. Weird, but it amused me for the trip at least. We went our separate ways and i met up with K-Dogg in Sale, got junk food, got my kiddies a present and saw Bernice in Best n less, working hard of course :) then headed back to kels and played Singstar. Ha, i actually beat her, not just once, but..three? times! yay. Singstar is good times. Then Kelly got food from a place that smelt insanely good (to someone who had not eaten in 33ish hours) while i sipped on my orange juice, then she dropped me off at Staceys.
"Famine Party."
Okay, so after everyone arrived, we made cupcakes, and realised we were missing out on the best bit (eating the mixture) so tessa took the liberty of doing that herself. Damn her, and her giving up of furniture. Grr. I do not appreciate all the times that the camera was on, watching our every move, nor being in charge of filming. Apparently, nobody likes Staceys boyfriend; "Nobody Enjoys Chris McKay." Cant possssssibly see why.. Zoe's little sister is the funniest, creepiest person i know. :)
We headed out to the back room, complete with pinball machine, big tv/puter, and tonnes of band stuff, and played some Guitar Hero-hmm, its rather not fun when i suck so much a cant finish a song on easy [it was only my second attempt, shuddup], and Thomas breezed through the expert setting. Oh well, it was still fun. Would've been more so had we been able to get one of the other remotes to work, and played two player. Zoe and i wanted to suck together...awkward phrasing perhaps.. After a bit, we decided to watch a film; Zoe said we must all watch 'Psycho Beach Party', so we did. My god. There are a few levels of movies. There are the ones that blow your mind for being clever, well put-together pieces of art, that you can watch over and over again, and love it every time. Then, there are the ones that are predictable and kinda wishy-washy; watchable, but a gererous amount of time is required between each viewing. Next, are the ones that arent particularly good, and you dont really mind if they crash and burn and die. The bottom level, they are the movies that are soooo poorly made, that it makes them entertaining as hell, and you spend the entire time going "wut?" Psycho Beach Party definitely falls into that last category.
After that, at around elevenish, we raced inside and started preparing the mountains of food we had ready to break our fast. Nachos anyone? or perhaps you would prefer some cupcakes, or chocolate, or carrot and hommus, or crackers, or chips, or grainwaves, or stawberries, or watermelon, or two kgs of lollipops, or marshmellows, or lollies, or skittles...? Or perhaps, if you ask Bronny nicely, she may share her kabana with you. My god, it made us feel ill looking at all that food.
Picture this; one minute to midnight, a bunch of girls ready to dive in on the above mentioned food, one girl ready to sit on anything but the floor, then the clock rolls over....Good, times. first thing i ate was a strawberry. Just in case you wanted to know.
After a while of 90s music and other random stuff we found on Stace's computer (Total eclipse of the heart, ABBA, Video killed the radio star, salmon dance, all the good stuff..), we watched A Walk To Remember. I'd seen it before, in all its predictable girly movieness, so i wasnt concentrating and i fell asleep, woke up in the credits when the light was turned on. WHO TURNS A LIGHT ON AT THREE? Oh well. I was kinda out of it, i heard people quiz each other; "Who Would You Rather"-with much lols- and Stacey decided that zero sleep for her seven oclock start at work would be better than minimal sleep. Needless to say, she was gone by the time i finally woke up. People left, then Me, Tessa and Bron eated junk for breakfast..twas a fair bit awkward just sitting with Bronny, considering how little she likes me.. i put my feet in the freezing pool, then Bek came and picked me up, and took me home.
Mother and kelly made up, after their ridiculous fight about whatever, then Kel came out too, after working with a very dead Stacey. Yep, the whole family. Ella and the boys were going absolutely nuts, and, as per usual, the girls were all quite catty...my fault mostly. I cannot help that they infuriate me to the point of shouting. Oh well. Sisters went back home, and then i did some homework (read: read through some Jap words), listened to some music, very very loudly, to drown out the screaming of my head, wrote part of a letter to George and made a phone call to George and fell asleep.
I woke up today, Monday, ew. Felt yuck so when mum came in, i told her and although i dont think she believed me, she told me to stay in bed, then i didnt get up for quite some time, by which time the parentals had disembarked on their journey to wherever the hell they went. Panadol is not my friend, didnt help at all, the stupid thing. i did some VTAC preference changing, seeing as though one of my picks is no longer running -.- and then tried to think of ways to answer the anticipated questions for tomorrows jap Sac. oh god. Messages from lima inform me that Depression Day allowed them to almost steal me a bag of wrist bands, then they got caught out and managed around twenty, and that she too is going to fail Japanese. At least we can fail together...I get really angry at our teacher around SAC times; she always seems to be helping the two girls that dont need bloody help. Ah well.
Congratulations erin on the safe arrival of your puppy :) i wish to meet him, asap, please. I want a kitten. Mum says i cant have one. This does not please me.
School tomorrow, Sac. Ew ew ew. Not going to be a good day at all. In fact, i think i may hide in the library for as much as i can, and keep my music on so i can drown out any annoying people. We'll see how we go.
The End.
Right. Well, it got to saturday. And after staying up late-ish friday night looking up terrible jokes to annoy people with, i woke up at twelveish, had a shower and jumped on the bus. Lo-and-behold, after waiting for it to show up with Josh, i got on and Zoe, Becc and Stacey were already on it. Weird, but it amused me for the trip at least. We went our separate ways and i met up with K-Dogg in Sale, got junk food, got my kiddies a present and saw Bernice in Best n less, working hard of course :) then headed back to kels and played Singstar. Ha, i actually beat her, not just once, but..three? times! yay. Singstar is good times. Then Kelly got food from a place that smelt insanely good (to someone who had not eaten in 33ish hours) while i sipped on my orange juice, then she dropped me off at Staceys.
"Famine Party."
Okay, so after everyone arrived, we made cupcakes, and realised we were missing out on the best bit (eating the mixture) so tessa took the liberty of doing that herself. Damn her, and her giving up of furniture. Grr. I do not appreciate all the times that the camera was on, watching our every move, nor being in charge of filming. Apparently, nobody likes Staceys boyfriend; "Nobody Enjoys Chris McKay." Cant possssssibly see why.. Zoe's little sister is the funniest, creepiest person i know. :)
We headed out to the back room, complete with pinball machine, big tv/puter, and tonnes of band stuff, and played some Guitar Hero-hmm, its rather not fun when i suck so much a cant finish a song on easy [it was only my second attempt, shuddup], and Thomas breezed through the expert setting. Oh well, it was still fun. Would've been more so had we been able to get one of the other remotes to work, and played two player. Zoe and i wanted to suck together...awkward phrasing perhaps.. After a bit, we decided to watch a film; Zoe said we must all watch 'Psycho Beach Party', so we did. My god. There are a few levels of movies. There are the ones that blow your mind for being clever, well put-together pieces of art, that you can watch over and over again, and love it every time. Then, there are the ones that are predictable and kinda wishy-washy; watchable, but a gererous amount of time is required between each viewing. Next, are the ones that arent particularly good, and you dont really mind if they crash and burn and die. The bottom level, they are the movies that are soooo poorly made, that it makes them entertaining as hell, and you spend the entire time going "wut?" Psycho Beach Party definitely falls into that last category.
After that, at around elevenish, we raced inside and started preparing the mountains of food we had ready to break our fast. Nachos anyone? or perhaps you would prefer some cupcakes, or chocolate, or carrot and hommus, or crackers, or chips, or grainwaves, or stawberries, or watermelon, or two kgs of lollipops, or marshmellows, or lollies, or skittles...? Or perhaps, if you ask Bronny nicely, she may share her kabana with you. My god, it made us feel ill looking at all that food.
Picture this; one minute to midnight, a bunch of girls ready to dive in on the above mentioned food, one girl ready to sit on anything but the floor, then the clock rolls over....Good, times. first thing i ate was a strawberry. Just in case you wanted to know.
After a while of 90s music and other random stuff we found on Stace's computer (Total eclipse of the heart, ABBA, Video killed the radio star, salmon dance, all the good stuff..), we watched A Walk To Remember. I'd seen it before, in all its predictable girly movieness, so i wasnt concentrating and i fell asleep, woke up in the credits when the light was turned on. WHO TURNS A LIGHT ON AT THREE? Oh well. I was kinda out of it, i heard people quiz each other; "Who Would You Rather"-with much lols- and Stacey decided that zero sleep for her seven oclock start at work would be better than minimal sleep. Needless to say, she was gone by the time i finally woke up. People left, then Me, Tessa and Bron eated junk for breakfast..twas a fair bit awkward just sitting with Bronny, considering how little she likes me.. i put my feet in the freezing pool, then Bek came and picked me up, and took me home.
Mother and kelly made up, after their ridiculous fight about whatever, then Kel came out too, after working with a very dead Stacey. Yep, the whole family. Ella and the boys were going absolutely nuts, and, as per usual, the girls were all quite catty...my fault mostly. I cannot help that they infuriate me to the point of shouting. Oh well. Sisters went back home, and then i did some homework (read: read through some Jap words), listened to some music, very very loudly, to drown out the screaming of my head, wrote part of a letter to George and made a phone call to George and fell asleep.
I woke up today, Monday, ew. Felt yuck so when mum came in, i told her and although i dont think she believed me, she told me to stay in bed, then i didnt get up for quite some time, by which time the parentals had disembarked on their journey to wherever the hell they went. Panadol is not my friend, didnt help at all, the stupid thing. i did some VTAC preference changing, seeing as though one of my picks is no longer running -.- and then tried to think of ways to answer the anticipated questions for tomorrows jap Sac. oh god. Messages from lima inform me that Depression Day allowed them to almost steal me a bag of wrist bands, then they got caught out and managed around twenty, and that she too is going to fail Japanese. At least we can fail together...I get really angry at our teacher around SAC times; she always seems to be helping the two girls that dont need bloody help. Ah well.
Congratulations erin on the safe arrival of your puppy :) i wish to meet him, asap, please. I want a kitten. Mum says i cant have one. This does not please me.
School tomorrow, Sac. Ew ew ew. Not going to be a good day at all. In fact, i think i may hide in the library for as much as i can, and keep my music on so i can drown out any annoying people. We'll see how we go.
The End.
Friday, August 21, 2009
Welcome Me To Blogger.
Okay, Blogger, show me what you got.
This is my first time on blogger, im a blogger virgin as it were, and it scares me that the font is bigger. Maybe thats just me. Anyways, on the the trivial happenings of the day :)
Oh-Ohh.
I woke up at six today, decided it was far too early to be alive, then went back to sleep. Until ten. Faaaaaaark!
Kelly drove me to school, and i made it for period one. Lucky i have a spare on friday morning, eh?
So, yes, i missed my last minute chance of eating, and got to school as bio started. Tessa walked in and sat on the floor. No chairs for her for fourty hours, lol. She makes me laugh. Bio was te-eerrribly exciting. We did a sheet, on something or other, took some notes, and that was really it. Dull.
Then recess. Erin, when there are a bunch of girls sitting in the corner, who are doing the goddam famine, you do not bring in your awesome sounding food and proceed to eat it in front of us. You just dont :P Recess was also dull. I was surprised to see Lima, and she was much warmer than i was, so i stole some body heat.
Then, Chem, Stapes and i sent Lima home, and then i was with Aaron and Mareesa for the booooring physics-y prac. You'd think, with all those wires it was gonna be interesting. Lemme tell you, seeing how hot or cold water is most certainly is not interesting. Then, we saw a demo on mixing some white powder with some other white powder, watched it go liquid and get really really cold. Still beats physics.
Lunch, walked alllllll the way to Kellys while it was all spitty, to get Christopher his goddam music, then back to school again. Good thing i didnt stick around the school; exo day in the grounds meant free food. Gah.
Japanese, was not that great. I answered some questions (about food) for Zoes survey, and then we worked through some environmental stuff. Lisa gave me her Exo day cardboard, its pretty. Still not joining 'the cult' as Erry puts it.
Hometime, bus was quiet.At home, James couldnt quite understand why i wasnt eating, but still proceeded to eat chocolate in front of me. Butthead. I really felt like toast. Not cool. Played some Tony Hawks, watched some TV, and as usual, wasted a whole bunch of time. I talked to Bek via telephonical device for a bit, and El (shes going into a big girl bed. and Jordy's going into the cot; i anticipate not much sleep for my big sister tonight...), and read some magazines. It is very cold. And i would very much like to be somewhere warm, so my hands do not feel like ice.
Number of hours without food so far: collectively 24 and 50 minutes
Number of hours to go: 25 ish?
Number of candles lit: four
Number of windows open: five
Just now, i have come to realise there are a tonne of things i currently miss. Read on if this intrigues you, if it doesnt, Seeya round.
I miss Swifts Creek, and the people there. I miss being able to lay in the middle of the road at night, running around the Pub with nay and clo, kidding ourselves that we were fantastic singers and we were gonna be the next Saddle Club. I miss climbing the tree outside Nikki's house, and not being able to get down so many times. I miss eating the mysterious purple fruit off the tree outside our house with Brooke in the summer, and practically living at her house until she moved away.
I miss the cool shows on TV; Doug, Rugrats (before all the added characters), Hey Arnold, AAAAAAAH Real Monsters!, The Animals Of Farthing Wood, Little Bear, and Power Rangers.
I miss when school was fun, and Josh and i used to race to see who could finish their work first.
I miss the times back in year 7-9 when noone had a boyfriend and we all spent our lunchtimes marrying leaves and each other.
I miss my grandma.
And pink lemonade.
I miss Renee. And i miss talking to her all the time, and spending time with her, bb.
I miss George a lot. I hate mount eliza for being so far away.
I miss Caity. Muffin. Cloe. Teagan. All those girls up there.
I miss mitch.
I miss when night time meant sleep and music. Not angryness and upsetness, and gah.
I miss my Daddy. And Bear. And Ben.
And i miss when every conversation i had with anyone was about something other than sex.
Its a very odd feeling that has come over me just now. The frustration of being so absorbed in what happened, but the sorta nice warm feeling that certain people are in my life because some of those things no longer are.
Hmm, oh the melancholiness is overwhelming.
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